Please Hold

Sometimes you just feel like you’re going round in circles right? Or one step forward two steps back. I want to write here but I… don’t.

Things don’t seem to be going the way I’d like them to go recently. I say recently but if I’m honest I’ve been struggling since August.

I suppose in the grand scheme of things I’ve got better, my depression has become more manageable and so I started reaching out, trying to grow my art career. Being a bit more brave and risk-taking and a bit less timid and safe.

Well you know what? It hasn’t worked. All I’ve been met with is ignorant criticism, elitism, snobbery and silence. I can’t handle this right now.

So for now I have to let go of those aspirations and concentrate on myself. My recovery. This time from now until the end of the year is deemed “Active Recovery time” and I am filling these days with mindfulness practice, playing at painting, yoga, nourishing exercise and anything I feel like doing. I am rebuilding my happy neural pathways.

Hopefully that includes writing here because I miss it.

And I still haven’t finished writing about Rodney Yee’s course… (and the Artist’s Way but let’s face it I gave up in August)


5 thoughts on “Please Hold

  1. “I am rebuilding my happy neural pathways” –

    me too! mine needs major reconstruction 😉

    “Hopefully that includes writing here because I miss it” –

    it’ll be good to hear more from you brija, yay!

      • omgosh, yes 😉

        in the early 80s (writing & painting), mid 90’s (poetry), and through the early to mid 2000s (painting), i had this kind of creative output bursts, so i’m “kinda” familiar to me, though each one’s been its own thing too!

        this time ’round, the digital (blog, ebooks, youtube) revolution (festival?) has finally swept me up and carried me to a banquet of offerings 😉

      • I long for the day when I say I have creative output bursts and be referring to a longer time than days! Great stuff.

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